The Adventure Continues. Christmas Letter 2014
The Adventure continues…
Let’s just pick up from the end of our 2013 Christmas letter. Adventure was not only the theme of 2013, but
it most definitely defines 2014.
Through a series of events, Dale realized that he needed a
break from 10 years of youth ministry at Church on the Hill. He didn’t know exactly what that looked like,
but he knew he needed to step away to find out.
Only months away from ordination, he looked for employment within the
Nazarene denomination, but nothing was available. A good friend of ours offered Dale seasonal work
in the Baker City area. He was approaching
a new season in the Spring. He also
offered to help with moving expenses. Everything
pointed us towards this opportunity, and we knew we had to make a decision quickly. Our house was still on the market. If it sold we could go and do just about
anything, anywhere, but we wanted to stay close to Noah’s mom, so he could grow
up knowing her. In order to be debt free
after adoption costs, we needed to find employment, and we needed to do it
quickly. We accepted the offer for the
season, planning to stay 2 years, pay off the adoption and get Hayley through
school and off to college. After that,
we would reevaluate and make a decision based on our long term goals. I desperately wanted to stay in McMinnville
where it was comfortable and familiar, where I had begun my adult life and made
all my lifelong friends, but I wanted to a taste of adventure as well.
During Spring Break we headed out. The adventure landed us in a community much
like the one we had known and loved. We
felt at home within weeks. Our neighbor,
Verla, welcomed us with flowers, and our friendship has grown into a sweet
arrangement. As long as she brings me
recipes and garden foods, I share all my crazy new food creations with her in
return. Our life of constant ministry
relaxed into focusing on our family. After
a week of public school, the girls were blessed with tuition to Harvest
Christian Academy where they could all attend together while making friends and
settling in. Our home sold within a month of us moving,
making us officially debt free. If we
weren’t visiting McMinnville, we had many visitors who trekked the 6+ hours to
check in on us. Sometimes, we would have
multiple visitors, which filled this huge space with love and laughter. It was also a great meeting place for those
who were traveling through the area to stop in before moving on. Kind of like a Bed and Breakfast. Our adventure brought us healing and
rest. Both of which we desperately
needed.
Our hearts yearned for chances to minister. Dale started serving in the youth department and
running sound on Sunday mornings. During
his long drive to work and back, he envisioned himself in ministry, but also
had several hours of solitude to reflect on what this adventure was all
about. It was a time to forgive the
wrongs of others and to see ministry from a different perspective. Sam and Bethany Roberts moved to Baker City a
week before us. Bethany, Hayley and I
picked up where we had left off in our small group in McMinnville with a few
other ladies joining us. It was a great
way to stay focused and content while not working for the first time since I
was 15.
Once the season started, Dale would get up at 2 AM, getting
home in time for dinner then heading to bed by 6. Many times we would leave so we would not
keep Dale awake. This gave us many
opportunities to explore the beautiful area that surrounded us, but it was not
what we were used to. Dale has always
been involved in much of the daily routine with the girls, that we all felt a
bit out of whack.
Consent for Noah’s adoption was given by his mom shortly
after the New Year, starting the process.
We officially welcomed Noah into our hearts as our own and started the
planning process for his little life. Just
after settling in, we learned that Noah’s adoption had been revoked. It was beyond our understanding. Noah didn’t deserve to be torn from our
family. As adults, it was our duty to
consider all of this before making such a life altering commitment. A decision we had not taken lightly. Our lawyer encouraged us to respond to the
revocation by opposing it. The adoption
had already been approved and signed and there was a birth certificate issued,
but DHS had not waived the home study, therefore, leaving an opening for
dispute in the future. So we agreed to
the process, knowing we had loved and cared for Noah and intended on providing
him with a stable, loving environment, bonding with him as our own. Unfortunately, after months of preparation and
several days in court, we were asked to return Noah back to his mom by the end
of October.
The weekend before learning this news, I attended a women’s
retreat in Idaho with the ladies from Baker Naz. Little did I know that the fellowship and message
was to prepare my heart for what was to come.
We never signed up for an adventure like this. How was I to prepare his little heart, and
ours, for his departure? The next day,
we headed to Mac. Dale, Hayden and Noah
stayed in McMinnville while Hayley, Hannah, and I drove with 4 other girls down
to Hume Lake for a girls retreat weekend.
That weekend was filled with a vast array of emotions, but it was needed
for the journey that was ahead of us. Unfortunately,
things did not go as we had hoped. Instead
of dropping off Noah in a strange place without a proper transition which is
what his mom wanted, we agreed on a plan at the last minute. We dropped Noah off with my sister, Shawna,
who he had spent more time with him over the last year. We had time to get him settled and say
goodbye, then Shawna facilitated the transition over the next 4 days with
Noah’s mom. This was the hardest thing I
have ever experienced. With the abundance
of love poured into his sweet life while we had him, it was time to trust that
God was in control of his life and would ultimately watch over Noah. We have only had one visit with Noah through
skype on Hayley’s birthday. No phone
calls. We were able to see photos on
Facebook for a short time, but not any more.
During this time, Dale was laid off for the season. Visiting with our friend, John, in
McMinnviille, Dale jokingly asked if he was hiring. John
replied with a job offer. He said it was
time for us come back from the desert. Within
a few weeks, Dale had secured a job for me and a ministry opportunity working
with Jim Ramos, founder of The Great Hunt for God and we made the decision to
move back to McMinnville. We’ve had 4
offers on places to stay while we look for a house. The reality has officially set in that we
have less than a month to pack what took me 4 months before. We hope to arrive in McMinnville on December
20, less than a week before Christmas.
The girls are excited to move back, working diligently in school to
transfer smoothly in Mac. While
returning Noah has been so very heartbreaking, we know we are supposed to be
back in our community where our friends and family can support us while we
grieve, we will certainly miss this amazing place we have called home for the
last 9 months. It is like we birthed a
new beginning. It was a painful process
at times, while also an incredible time of healing and growing and
strengthening our family. There are
other mini adventures and experiences that we would love to share with you. If you don’t have Facebook, you missed
out. Give us a call, set up a coffee
date with us, we would be happy to share.
Speaking of sharing, did you know that we love to share how
God has taken us very broken and messed up and has continued to teach and shape
us? If you are not perfect, but want the
one who is perfect to rescue you from helplessness, hopelessness and fear, the
one who can teach you and shape you so you can find hope through tragedy and
pain, let us know, we would love to join you on your adventure.
We look forward to the adventure in 2015 while we cautiously
tend to our grieving hearts for Noah. We
know this is not the end of our story. Boxes
are taking over the house and we are weeding through what is important and what
doesn’t need to come with us. We are
spending as much time with those that we have grown to love as family in Baker
City. It is likely that you will receive
this card sometime in the transition process from Baker City to
McMinnville. This is our favorite time
of year. A time to celebrate God’s love
for us, He gave us more than we ever deserve, a son… one that will save us from
all the sin, grief, heartbreak and pain that this short life will throw at us. For that, we are grateful. As I write this, I am still not sure exactly
where my heart is or how much trust I have actually acquired, but I know that
God is a big God and he loves each of us, so he can care for us far better than
any human can.
Here is our new information, in case you want to visit, send
us something or talk.
Dale, Heather, Hayley, Hannah, Hayden, and Roxy Collver
PO Box 871 (after Dec 18)
1563 SE Susan Ln
McMinnville, OR 97128
Dale: 503-435-2545 Email Dale
Heather: 971-241-7628 Email Heather
House: 971-241-9248
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